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The Masked Engineer: Mario Orazio

Mario Orazio is the pseudonym of a well-known television engineer who wishes to remain anonymous. Send your questions or comments to him c/o TV Technology. Or drop him a note on e-mail Mario_Orazio@imaspub.com .

Date
Story title
(08.23.06)

Mobile TV Might Suck, But It Could Earn You $$
Yes, this will be another rant-and-rave about mobile TV.

(07.26.06)

Getting to Home Base With A Cast of Multi
You might not have noticed that the term HDTV doesn't necessarily guarantee quality.

(06.28.06)

Next-Gen Monitoring: You Just Late And See
You might not have noticed that the first part of Sherlock Holmes's explanation to Dr. Watson gets ignored.

(05.31.06)

The 2006 Mario Awards
Ah, Las Vegas. Where else would you find a woman's near-naked derriere blown up to about two stories high on the side of a hotel in what's now promoting itself as a family-friendly city?

(04.24.06)

Aspects of Loveliness: Fix It? Heck, No!
You might not have noticed that not everyone on TV is fat. Yes, this month's rant is about image shapes.Here's what I mean.

(03.24.06) Break Out the Lawyers, It's Congress, Again!
You might not have noticed that NAB stands for National Association of Broadcasters, and it's pronounced N. A. B. These days, folks go to Las Vegas to attend a "nab" show on account of they want to nab a deal on a mobile-phone modem or a satellite set-top box or maybe a massage chair. Oh, yeah, and somewhere amid the vast acreage of camcorders, cable channels, and CD burners, if you look really hard you might find a TV transmitter or two.
(02.10.06) Compression Is Easy
You might not have noticed that objective measurements have gone the way of NTC-7. I ain’t sure if that’s good or bad, but it surely does leave a big hole in equipment specs.
(01.16.06) Hi-D! Hi-D! Hi-D! No?
You might not have noticed that all numbers are zero. There’s a good reason you might not have noticed that, but I’ll get back to that in a few shakes of an image stabilizer. First, I wanted to mention the purpose of this month’s rant: proving that HDTV ain’t color.
(11.23.05)

Widescreen HD Gets Toasted by Cell Phones
You might not have noticed that Steve Jobs changed his mind. Let me put that another way: You might not have noticed that the most important thing about HDTV is NTSC.

(10.19.05)

It's Not the Frequencies, Stupid
You might not have noticed that leeches and maggots have been in federal government news recently. Yes, this month's rant is about Hurricane Katrina and DTV.

(09.21.05)

It's High Time to Make DTV Work
You might not have noticed that summer's over. Congress is back in session, and it's time to knuckle down and complete the DTV transition.

(08.17.05)

Let's Talk About Optics Downticks
You might not have noticed that neutral-density filters are our friends. But first, you also might not have noticed that OConnor introduced some HDTV camera mounts at April's NAB show. I am not making this up.

(07.20.05)

What About the Tiny TVs?
You might not have noticed that there are numbers smaller than 13. I point this out because the FCC, Our Beloved Commish, seems to have just made the discovery.

(06.22.05)

Blind Faith at NAB2005
You might not have noticed that it's tough to rate the image quality of a block of wood. The same applies to Panasonic's new AG-HVX200 camcorder. Okay, what I'm really talking about here is religious faith.

(04.18.05)

High Definition Has Its Place--In Cameras
You might not have noticed that a meal of a cheeseburger, fries and a milkshake with a Cheerio is about as heart-healthy as one without. Yes, I'm making a plea here for everyone to shoot HDTV.

(03.28.05)

Which Transition is Which?
You might not have noticed that HDTV can be analog.

(02.16.05)

Numbers, Fingers, Toes and Quality
Have you noticed that there are really only two definitions of the word digital? One means related to fingers or toes. The other means numerical. That's all. So, unless you happen to be a finger, toe or number fetishist, there ain't any definition of digital that happens to mean good.

(01.19.05)

Survey Says: We Don't Care About HDTV
You might not have noticed that sometimes a purchase has more than you wanted.

(11.24.04)

Labels, Cables and Other Assorted Rantings
You might not have noticed, but my last blather was about a lack of labels on TVs. So on account of inertia being my favorite state, I decided to stay with the label theme in this here column.

(10.20.04)

Analog Obsolescence Looms
You might not have noticed that it's been seven-and-a-half years since the U.S. digital television rules came out. Here are some of the reasons why you might not have noticed:

(09.22.04)

Scaling Mount Ed Display
You might not have noticed that there is still a production aperture and a viewing aperture. Let me put that another way: Safe-action and safe-title areas exist even in the age of plasma panels and LCDs. And that's a problem.

(08.18.04)

Surprise! HDTV Has Higher Definition
You might not have noticed that HDTV has higher definition than standard-definition television. I am not making this up.

(07.21.04)

So Everyone Is Wrong... Now What?
You might not have noticed that not everything that everyone agrees on is correct.

(06.23.04)

The 'F' in FCC Stands for Fun!
You might not have noticed that your laptop doesn't have an 802.11a connection. Let me put that another way: you might not have noticed that Our Beloved Commish, aka the FCC, has a great sense of humor.

(05.24.04)

The 2004 Mario Award Winners ...
Yeesh! It's tough enough covering 100 square miles of exhibits in four days and wading through 100,000 Applets hogging the Apple booth without having to deal with NAB's booth numbers.

(04.21.04)

The Meaning of HDTV Ain't Very Clear
What I really want to rant about this month is good old high definition. The problem is defining definition and figuring out how high is high -- that and some other stuff.

(03.26.04)

MPEG-2 Is Alive and Well And Living in China
Good old analog NTSC is supposed to die one second after 11:59:59 p.m. on Dec. 31, 2006 (and, if the FCC had its way, it would be a year earlier than that). Will it?

(02.18.04)

Greetings From Planet Television
You might not have noticed that we live on the third planet from the star in our solar system. I mention this because of the ultra-alien things that have been going on lately in TV-set pricing.

(01.21.04)

Was that 'Robust' or 'Go Bust?'
You might not have noticed that, if you want recent commercial-free movies on video, there are better places to look than broadcast TV.

(11.26.03)

DTV By the Numbers
You might not have noticed that numbers used to mean something. I mean you wouldn't say two is the same as one, would you? Hint: You might not want to answer this right away.

(10.29.03)

Mining the 'Or' in the Digital Cable Order
Somewhere out there, you might not have noticed that audio exists. This is especially true if you are a producer, director, member of the lighting persuasion, or camera op.

(09.17.03)

The Future of Television?
You might not have noticed that there's a word in every language for someone who makes predictions. That word is idiot.

(08.20.03)

To HD or Not to HD
You might not have noticed that HDTV is inevitable. Too bad we don't know where Evitable is.

(07.23.03)

Hi-Res vs. Hi-Def? The Answer is in the Starz!
You might not have noticed that HDTV is great, and that's a problem. I don't mean that it's a problem that you ain't noticed that HDTV is great.

(06.25.03)

If It's Good Enough for PlayStation 2 . . .
You might not have noticed that next year is 2004. Cancel that. Of course you know what next year is. What you might not have noticed is the supercomputer recently made from home video games. I am not making this up.

(05.26.03) 10th Annual Mario Awards Winners
The show floor was bigger and attendance was down -- so the BAR (the booth-to-attendee ratio) was approaching 1:1 -- but, for the first time in many Mario-Award cycles, the NAB show was chock full of new technology. It was tough to choose, so all of you losers can consider yourselves winners, too (if that'll keep you from suing me).
(04.23.03) NTSC Takes on All Comers
You might not have noticed that NTSC wasn't the world's first television broadcasting standard. And, yes, I'm talking about the first NTSC -- not the one that gave us color in 1953, but the one that gave us 525 interlaced scanning lines 30 times a second in 1941.
(03.19.03) Be Kind to the FCC: Donate Calendars
You might not have noticed that, in a typical calendar, April comes before May. What am I talking about? Of course you've noticed that! Anyone not in advanced stages of Alzheimer's disease or something worse knows that. No, there's only one place where they ain't got a clue as to the relationship between April and May, and that's at Our Beloved Commish, aka the FCC.
(02.19.03)

Arroz By Any Other Name Would Still Be Rice
You might not have noticed that now that millions of Americans have glymphs, the znarble transition has finally taken off.

(01.22.03)

The Broadcast Flag: Long May It Waver
You might not have noticed that the Internet is different from a light-bulb joke. Nah, you probably have noticed that, and you probably know it's not still 1976, too. Too bad CBS doesn't seem to have noticed either.

(11.27.02)

Happy Anniversary to You, You Belong in a Zoo!
You might not have noticed that you don't get asked the Two Questions at airline ticket counters anymore. And, if you're like me, maybe you feel a little more secure as a result.

(10.23.02) Earth to Congress: We Watch TV
You might not have noticed
that the denizens of the U.S. Capitol have unusual senses of humor. It must have something to do with the marsh gasses. Once a swamp, always a swamp.
(09.18.02) Surprise! It's 2002!
Mikey's big accomplishment recently was getting Our Beloved Commish to vote 3-1 on Aug. 8 to change one part of Mikey's voluntary April "Proposal to Speed the DTV Transition" from voluntary to mandatory.
(08.21.02)

The Plan, Boss! The Plan!
You might not have noticed that not all circus performers are lexicographers. I ain't all that sure where Michael Powell, the head of Our Beloved Commish (a/k/a the FCC), falls on that scale. I know he can still do cartwheels. And I think he has some trouble with the English language.

(07.24.02)

This Little Piggy of a Market
You might not have noticed that there's a wee mite of a difference between Salt Lake City and the Salt Lake City television market.

(06.26.02)

With Gifts Like These, Who Needs Enemies?
YOU MIGHT NOT HAVE NOTICED that Congress doesn't write all the laws. Nature has come up with a few. Last time I checked, the Second Law of Thermodynamics didn't appear in the Federal Code

(04.17.02)

The Problem With Plasma
YOU MIGHT NOT HAVE NOTICED that sex isn't everything. And I ain't being Lombardiesque here; it ain't the only thing either. Yes, of course, this lunar cycle I'm ranting about plasma displays. What else could I be referring to?

(04.03.02) Why Shoot in Film?
YOU MIGHT NOT HAVE NOTICED that Kodak has not yet followed Enron into the bowels of corporate near-nonexistence. There is a very good reason for that. People buy film. And there's one whole heck of a good reason why people buy film. It works.
(02.20.02) DTV Sales: New Math
You might not have noticed that TV sets work and set-top boxes don't. "Mario, what do you mean by that?" This: Withdraw your life's savings and take a year off. Go to your friendly, neighborhood electronics shop or supermarket or drugstore and buy one of those $20 little TVs. Buy a ticket to Punta Arenas, Chile, on the Strait of Magellan - an airport from which planes fly to Antarctica. Take the TV with you. After you land, turn on the TV. It works.
(01.23.02) Yes, Less HS Mess Stress, I Guess
You might not have noticed that Quantel has a great idea. Hey, don't get me wrong. Quantel has had some strange ideas too, like how you should mortgage your firstborn to pay for the company's stuff. But that ain't what I wanted to rant about this lunar cycle. I wanted to rant about the HS mess we're in.
(12.12.01)

Definition's Not the D in DTV
You might not have noticed that, as time goes by, more and more people are understanding DTV... less. There's plenty of blame to go around, but – if I absolutely had to pick the greatest offender – it would have to be the good old Consumer Electronics Association – CEA – or, as I am wont to pronounce it, See-ya.

(11.14.01)

DTV Has Been Fixed – Again
You might not have noticed that HDTV consists of a lot more information than SDTV. Eventually, Nellie the Neuron is going to use that line to pull me around to ranting about the latest plans to fix DTV.

(10.17.01) Something Big Broke
You might not have noticed that everything breaks. Venus de Milo once had arms. The Sphinx once had a nose. The Grand Canyon was once flat. Everything breaks.
(09.19.01) Widescreen Lenses? Flying Pigs, Too
You might not have noticed that lenses are round. Also, P. T. Barnum is alive and well and living in a lens factory. Okay, so he really ain't. But when he said, "There's a sucker born every minute," he didn't know the half of it –or should I say the 9/16 of it? Geez!
(08.22.01)

Simulcasting About for a Solution
SOMEWHERE OUT THERE You might not have noticed that DTV stations don't have to simulcast the programming on their NTSC counterparts.

(07.25.01)

Widescreen Stretches Hype to New Limits
SOMEWHERE OUT THERE You might not have noticed that Philips has done it again.

(06.27.01)

SIMPLE: Love Thy Neighbor
You might not have noticed that bandwidth is somewhat more expensive than zero cents per bit per second per mile.

(05.16.01)

There's Nothing Like Progress!
SOMEWHERE OUT THERE You might not have noticed that it's possible to watch lousy NTSC. Hey – I ain't for one second suggesting that you ought to watch lousy NTSC; I'm just saying it's possible.

(05.10.01)

The 2001 Mario Awards
SOMEWHERE OUT THERE You might not have noticed that there was plenty of fun new stuff at the NAB show this year. "Slow show" my hoof!

(05.09.01)

TV TECHNOLOGY ANNOUNCES 2001 MARIO AWARD WINNERS
April 25, 2001 - NAB 2001 - Las Vegas, NV –TV Technology announced is has selected the 10 winners of the 2001 Mario Awards.

(01.24.01)

It's A Small World After All
SOMEWHERE OUT THERE You might not have noticed that in Japan they drive on the left. I ain't got a fraction of a notion why that is. Could be it has something to do with samurai riding on the left so they could swing swords at opponents. Or could be it's something more bizarre.

(year 2001)

MSTV and NAB Have Spoken; Now What?
SOMEWHERE OUT THERE You might not have noticed that journalists sometimes get things wrong. No, I ain't talking about everything they wrote about the MSTV/NAB joint resolution; I'm talking about everything they asked – or didn't.

(year 2001)

The FCC Leaves Its Legacy
SOMEWHERE OUT THERE You might not have noticed that QPSK and QAM are different. Okay, I guess you probably have noticed that, but it looks as though Our Bye-bye Commish (OBC) didn't, and that could be bad news for DTV broadcasters and viewers.

(11.15.00)

And After 2006 What Happens?
SOMEWHERE OUT THERE You might not have noticed that people watch television. You might also not have noticed that people tend not to throw money away.

(10.31.00)

Standardizing the Unstandardizable
SOMEWHERE OUT THERE You might not have noticed that Don Quixote is alive and well and working in Washington, D.C. And here's an even more amazing statement: This here lunar cycle I ain't gonna poke (too much) fun at my pals at the Consumer Electronics Association (CEA)

(10.31.00)

Why the FCC Should Have Approved the Sinclair Petition
SOMEWHERE OUT THERE You might not have noticed that you can catch more flies with honey than with vinegar. First, however, I'd like to submit a little note about the style of this month's offering.

(10.18.00)

Definitively Defining Definition
SOMEWHERE OUT THERE You might not have noticed that, as they said in the movie "Delicatessen," no one is entirely evil. Conversely, unfortunately, no one is entirely good. For instance, take Bill Clinton.

(10.31.00)

Beware of the Factoid
SOMEWHERE OUT THERE You might not have noticed that the U.S. airport with the highest on-time arrivals rate in January was the one in Kalispell, Montana, with 87 percent. More interested in on-time departures? That would be Montrose, Colo., at 96.2 percent. Any questions?

(09.20.00)

Kennard's HDTV Dot-Con
SOMEWHERE OUT THERE You might not have noticed that advertising and education are two different fields. But, even if you don't care about either, stick around a wee mite longer. I promise to reveal by the end of this month's rant the answer to that most burning of questions: Is HDTV really necessary?

(year 2000)

What’s Digital Television?
SOMEWHERE OUT THERE You might not have noticed that some words are more meaningful than others. For instance, take the word air, as in the famous Mediterranean-tourist phrase, The air is humid but the figs divine.

(year 2000)

Success and New Math of DTV
SOMEWHERE OUT THERE You might not have noticed that Digital Creative Development Corp. (DC2) is one of the oldest technology companies around. It's older than NxtWave. It's older than Avid. It's older than Apple or Microsoft. It's older than the ATSC. It's old.

(year 2000)

DTV - and its new "enhancements"
SOMEWHERE OUT THERE You might not have noticed that this time all the technical rules have changed. Ayup, this is another rant on DTV - and its new "enhancements."

 

 
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